Top 5 Sea Monsters

5. Dunkleosteus

 Dunkleosteus was a 30 foot long carnivorous tank. It was outlasted by sharks, but I am sure that is small consolation for the variety of creatures this beast ate. Instead of teeth, it had bony ridges, like a turtle. It has been calculated that they had a bite force of 8,000 pounds per square inch, putting it on par with crocodiles and T-Rex in terms of being history’s strongest biters. They also believe, based on the evidence in the skull regarding its musculature, that it could have opened its mouth in one fiftieth of a second, meaning it vacuumed food into its guillotine of a mouth.

The plates that made up the “teeth” changed as the fish aged from a solid, rigid jaw to segments that allowed it to hold prey easier, and made it more effective in biting through the bony plate armor of other armored fish. In the arms race that was the prehistoric ocean, Dunleosteus was a predatory super tank.

4. Kronosaurus

 Kronosaurus is another short-necked pliosaur (like Liopleurodon up at number 9), and like Liopleurodon, its overall length has been contested. It was a “mere” 30 feet long and the longest teeth in its massive mouth were up to 11 inches long. This is why it was named after Cronus, the king of the old Greek Titans.

Guess where it lived? If you guessed “Australia”, then you  have been paying attention to life (and are correct). The head was up to 9 feet long. They could eat an entire modern man whole, and still have room left over for half of another. It has also been suggested that since their flippers are so similar in design to those of modern sea turtles, that they may have crawled out onto land to lay eggs. You can be sure no one was digging up these thing’s nests to get at the eggs.

3. Helicoprion

 These sharks grew to be about 15 feet long, and had a lower jaw that was made of a “tooth whorl”. It looks like a cross between a circular saw and a shark, and when you mix apex predators with power tools, the world quakes in fear.

Helicoprion’s teeth were serrated, implying that they were definitely carnivores, but there is some debate as to whether their teeth were in the front of the mouth, as shown in the picture, or if they were farther back, which would suggest a softer diet, like jellyfish. However it was arranged, it clearly worked; Helicoprion survived the Permian Triassic extinction, which means they may have been smart enough to create bomb shelters. Or maybe they just lived in the deep sea.

2. Livyatan melvillei

 Remember me mentioning “hypercarnivorous” whales? Well here it is. Imagine a cross between an orca and a sperm whale. Livyatan melvillei was a whale that ate other whales. It had the largest teeth of any animal to ever use their teeth to eat (elephant tusks are bigger, but they just look impressive and help them smash things; they don’t eat with them) topping out at 1.18 feet. They lived in the same oceans and ate the same food as the Megalodon, so this whale actually had to compete with the largest predatory shark ever.

Not to mention their head was 10 feet long and featured the same echo-locating equipment as modern toothed whales, making them much more effective in murky water. In case it was not obvious, this beast was named after the leviathan, a giant sea monster from the bible, and Herman Melville, who wrote Moby Dick. If the great white whale had been one of these, it would have eaten the Pequot and everyone aboard as a snack.

1. Giant Stingray

What grew 17 feet across, had a 10 inch poison spike in its tail and was strong enough to drag a boat filled with people? In this case, a prehistoric super-fish that is still lurking around in fresh and brackish waters from the Mekong river to northern Australia. Stingrays have been around since a few million years after the dinosaurs died out, and have proven to be a successful design, much like the sharks they descended from.

The giant stingrays use that tried and true ancient design, but have somehow managed to survive ice ages and even the catastrophic Toba event. They were featured on Animal Planet’s River Monsters, and despite the host’s tendency to exaggerate damn near everything, they are incredibly dangerous to fool around with, even if you don’t know you are fooling around with one. They are notorious for putting their neurotoxin covered spike completely through limbs. I guess, on the plus side, if there is one, at least they won’t try to eat you.